Someone needs to read this today. Someone needs to be reminded that they are not their past.
You are NOT the sexual abuse, the credit card debt, the abortion you had. You are NOT the little girl feeling lost and alone in an unsupportive family; being arrested, or bad choices in choosing partners.
You are NOT the rape, being fired from that job or waking up in a stranger’s bed.
You are NOT the mistakes that you made 10, 20, 30 or 40 years ago (or even yesterday).
You are NOT the overdose, the self-medicating; the bullying you suffered from others and now offer yourself.
You are NOT the affair, the fear that keeps you up at night or the weight you carry with you.
You are NOT the food stamps or the judgement from others.
You are NOT the time you were almost living out of your car, the people that you hurt or the actions you feel you can never forgive.
You are NOT the mean words spoken to you or about you.
You are NOT the long nights of partying searching for connection and release.
You are NOT the people-pleasing, the pent up anger or the hatred that you feel.
You are NOT solely any of these things or others not here but know deep down inside.
You. Just. Aren’t.
Just like you, my story is woven into the words above. Just like you, there is more that I can add and some that I cannot relate.
Just like you, it is not ALL of who I am.
Some of our past we could not choose for ourselves. Much of our past we would go back and change, if we could.
But we can’t.
The hurtful memories and the regrets that plague us do not make up all of who we are.
They are just a piece. One piece of many pieces; several pieces of many more.
Like a thread that weaves a beautiful tapestry or a block that builds an ornate cathedral. If we pull out that thread or remove that block, there will be a bare spot that shows.There will be places in the structure that will go unsupported.
Regret can be a teacher or a thief
These regrets of ours can help guide us to step fully into a life we now want to live. Or they can be a thief that keeps our head turned looking behind and missing out on what is in front of us.
It can keep us from appreciating where we are now and all the good that has come our way.
Today is a choice
Make a choice to step fully into today and into tomorrow. Stand with your head held high and offer yourself love and forgiveness.
Look at your past as a stepping stone to embrace the future and to help others who are faced with their own pain.
The world needs you; all of you. The wholeness of your past and the vulnerability to own who that has helped you become.
Shine on, lovely one. Shine on.
This post also appears over at MidlifeSchmidlife.com